I’ve heard a lot about negativity all of my life, and a little about the power of positive thinking to correct it (and, when I was in Houston, Mickey Gilley’s song about drowning negativity through the power of positive drinking, which I am not endorsing).
The first time I heard the term, “Positivity” was at a John Gottman training for therapists. His research found that relationships need a healthy ratio of positive interactions to negative ones. He says the “magic ratio” is 5:1. If we compliment five times more than we complain, smile more than frown, be soft and vulnerable instead of hard and volatile, then we have more positivity and satisfaction.
Ken Blanchard and his team at the One Minute Manager training limited negativity even more. They teach the secret of setting a goal with others, then catch them doing things right, and give them a praising. They do not allow reprimands unless the one receiving it is a proven performer, otherwise, the response to a mistake is more training and encouragement toward the goal.
When my two sons were boys, they did not like playing catch with each other. When either of them played with me, I said something encouraging with each throw or attempt to catch the ball: “nice try” or “you almost got it that time!” Their remarks to each other needed more positivity and less name-calling and negative labeling.
If you would like more information about positivity: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-positive-perspective-dr-gottmans-magic-ratio/
One of my sons is a deputy sheriff. Those nights when he leaves for work in his bullet-proof vest, his hugs with his wife and daughter feel different, and their prayers are different, maybe more intense for his safe return in the morning.
Almost certainly, the police officers who have been ambushed and shot, had left their families with hugs and prayers, too. Those families grieve that there will be no more hugs, and they have doubts about a God who did not seem to answer their prayers.
Of course, police lives matter. And, of course, the public expects the knights who protect us from the dragons to not only enforce the law but also to exemplify and obey it.
It is wrong when a police officer does not live up to his oath, or abuses his authority. It is wrong to kill an innocent police officer in retaliation for another’s misconduct.
Tonight when we say our prayers for our families, let’s also pray for those who act like violent dragons and for the families in law enforcement who want to hug their knights after their shifts are over.
Anxiety and Stress
Everyone experiences anxiety and stress at one time or another. The difference between them is that stress is a response to a threat in a situation. Anxiety is a reaction to the stress.
Whether in good times or bad, most people say that stress interferes at least moderately with their lives. Chronic mental strain can affect your health, causing symptoms from headaches, high blood pressure, and chest pain or heart palpitations, skin rashes, and loss of sleep.
But you can learn how to reduce the impact of mental strains and manage your symptoms. We are here to help you.
The normal ups and downs in life mean that everyone feels sad from time to time. But if emptiness and despair have taken hold of your life and won’t go away, you may have depression. Depressive states make it tough to function and enjoy life like you once did. Just getting through the day can be overwhelming. But no matter how hopeless you feel, you can get better. Understanding the signs, symptoms, causes, and treatment of depression is the first step to overcoming the problem with our help.